It’s not all my fault

I feel because of my illness everything is my fault and i am paranoid. But its not all my fault!

My sister made herself and her daughter dinner then walked in while eating said “if you want something help yourself ” it took 3hours to get there and she couldn’t offer while doing her own dinner.

I sat there thinking i am at fault i should of brought my own food, i shouldn’t be there, i am a burden, i am not good enough for her to think about while doing her dinner.
This then made me cry, feel uncomfortable, feel like i shouldn’t be there and i should go home, i sat there checking the train times.

Isnt is sad how one thing can change everything !!!

Because i have this illness not everything is my fault!

I now write things down in a notebook, then work through, what is said, how i feel and what to do, once it out my head hopefully i might be able to act in a different way.